You know it is a desperate cry for action when you stoop to pollinating your own plants because your bored, and think it's sexy. Then again, hey there, look at all the pollen and nectar coating that stigma, why, it is just yearning for some innocent little bee to come along and help it get down with the ladies. Plants need lovin' too baby. Besides, there is no one around, and the flowers are so exposed, so free, feeling the sun warm their fertile petals, it just drives me wild! Why, look, it's an innocent vine exploring my silky leg, creeping higher, unzipping my pants. Mmmmm, I'm all tied down with no where to go, I'm so glad there aren't any bees around to do this work for me. And from then on, it just gets bizarre. Looking up plant pollination on the internet, I mean who wouldn't want to hit this:

Oh yeah, one sweet piece of ass. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go to my greenhouse to, ummmm, continue wearing my pants, yeah, that's it, continue...